Available now, or soon. Sort of.

The paperback of A Perilous Margin is now available through amazon.com which is unfortunately as close as it gets for Australians, as there is no printer down under.

2016-04-25 19.43.07However, the UK/European amazon are having issues and aren’t linking to any new books at the moment. Being a monolith they are unable to tell me when it might be resolved. I suspect that one day, as if by magic, it will suddenly appear, and the poor people scurrying behind the scenes at amazon will burst free from the mountain of complaints from antsy self-publishers.

 

Despite the issues, I got my copies! And they are silky smooth and much nicer than the proofs.

It is not the grand finale I was hoping for, but I do believe it is all done! Sort of.

The pudding is in the proof

I was very excited last week after ordering my proof copy. The final step seemed like it was finally getting closer.

But I was also slightly terrified. I have seen my writing published before and have always greeted it was a mixture of humiliation and disappointment.

Reading my own writing on the computer or on home-printed pages is very different. It is undeniably homemade and because of that, it is easy to think that it is okay. But published? Suddenly it is in the same format as every book I read, and I read a lot of very good books. Seeing my own work in a format comparable to my favourite authors does not help an already shaky self-confidence.

So last week I was preparing to be disappointed. I was scared that I would open the proof copy and want to tear out pages. Throw it in the bin. Forget the whole idea because really, who am I to think I can do this?

But I had a plan. The copy was supposed to arrive on Friday. So Friday evening I would go for a swim and arrive home feeling endorphin-fueled and ready for a weekend of whatever would come.

I walked through the door on Thursday night though, and there was an undeniably book-shaped package on the floor. Damn Amazon’s super efficient service! What to do? I was slightly hungover and running on not enough sleep. I was not in good shape to confront what I was sure would be the horror within.

I briefly thought I could ignore it but really, who was I kidding?

First I checked the formatting, refusing to actually read anything. The formatting looked good, which it should do after last weekend’s hours of frustration. Slightly too small a font but that is easily changed.

With a cup of tea, I sat to read the first page. Then the next and the next until I had read the whole prologue. Oh, I thought, that actually wasn’t too bad. I read it again. I made one small change. I read it again. And I grinned! It wasn’t terrible. And I thought, maybe I can do this.

2016-04-07 18.47.57

So one more weekend of reading it, of making small changes, of resubmitting it, and then that will be that. This time next week, I plan to be throwing my hands in the air and declaring it over.

The slog

When I started reading about self-publishing I read a lot of helpful articles that said things like, “it’s instant!”, and “one weekend is all it takes!”. After a couple of weeks including 6 days over Easter, I can safely say they lied.

Applying for and receiving an ISBN took several days, learning about and then formatting the manuscript took even longer (including many hours of hair pulling), and then experimenting with a cover (which was the fun part) took even longer again.

It got to the point where I couldn’t even pretend that I knew what I was doing anymore, and my wonderful partner,  family, and friends all stepped up and helped me out with the blurb and cover options.

Today, finally, I ordered a proof copy. And the excitement has hit! Except that I still have to go to work and be all diligent and conscientious because that is just who I am. I am also impatient, however, so have paid twice as much to receive the proof this week instead of by the end of April.

I’m already rethinking the cover, and know at least two things in the actual manuscript I will probably need to change, but it is still feeling so close. So very close!